I really don't want to move...I'm having a motivation problem.
kev is about to show us pictures of the tranny he accidentally fucked last night.
I'll be there in 10
Fine. Just this once and because its veterans day will I send you a picture of my tits. You're lucky I love this country.
Should I be alarmed that you're a regular enough at a bar to show up in sweatpants?
Are we going out tonight?
My conscience says no but my vag says yes
dont call me baby and dont touch my ears. ITS ALL I ASK
you cant ever make fun of my bong's stick on moustache again. its the reason the cop let me keep it and my weed.
I found a fingernail in my vagina. A fingernail.
Grandpa got a dui while riding a horse. This is what I need to live up to.
dude, i warned you that using a card to pay for my hotel room was a bad idea. You deserve the extra $600 in cleaning fees
I'll be there soon. I expect Advil and a bucket of kittens when I arrive.
I'm sorry but you're choosing a girl that faked a pregnancy when you wouldn't return her calls over a more attractive sane girl who you begged for a chance with last week? God you're a loser.
She just won 2 Grammys at 17 and were sitting here hotboxing our half bathroom
He's mad at me because I said I wouldn't date him if his dick was smaller. I fail to see the issue
sex on acid sucks though, i want to connect with the universe not your dick.
I woke up with your bra on, and some guys boxers. I'm in a random truck, in the middle of nowhere...
Randomize
