so i just googled the prescription for aldara i saw on your desk this morning...
I have diapers under my sink. trying to convince myself to use them.
I just discovered cum stains from two different guys on my wall. I don't know whether to be proud or horrified.
We haven't even moved into the apartment yet and she has already screwed two of our neighbors. This is going to be the longest 12 month lease of my life.
He purred while eating me out. HE PURRED AND I LIKED IT.
And I just realized we will be at a strip club when the end of the world is supposed to happen. This is destiny
you were telling us about the time you had sex in an alley and he stopped, looked up and said 'it was a cul-de-sac' and went right back to what he was doing.
Woke up with a text saying "when I get to see them titties again lil ma??" With 8 beads around my neck & an empty bottle of vodka in my arms.
Plus now I feel weird sleeping with you. It's like shooting a three legged deer. It's already at a disadvantage and couldn't get what it's full potential deserves.
The cops came, and I made friends with him. He wants me to babysit his kids.
And I made some girl take out the trash, load and unload the dishwasher, swifter, and clean the counters. So don't act like I don't do anything.
Our nipples touched last night. It was tender.
The fact that you got a stranger guy to buy you a pizza off tinder makes me feel amazing
you tried to drunkinly do the backflip kick off of karate kid and broke the big screen
When I meet her I'm going to have to resist the urge of saying "hey! We're Eskimo sisters!"
Randomize
