Help. Asians are flirting in front of me(773): They speak asian
oh my god I didn't know your sister was this good at french kissing
I got so drunk I pissed the bed last night. He still likes me. He's a keeper
He is a keeper. You on the other hand are not.
bl l w
this should be fun to decipher. I'd like to buy a vowel.
Kind of a slow process. Played 9 holes with her yesterday. Wish one of them was hers
When i woke up this morning she asked me 'when did you first find out that you could see the future.' I gotta stop drinking.
Remind them to make the "above the influence" commercial about us fallin off a ferris wheel
Was just practicing flip cup with my NyQuil cup...
There's a guy at this party taking all the unfinised beers and pouring them into a pitcher so he can drink them tomorrow.
since we're both too lazy to go to each others house, you drink there, i'll drink here and we'll skype. it's the same thing.
In a car. Threw up in my mouth. Haven't said a word in 10 minutes.
WHO THE FUCK TAGS THEMSELVES AT COUNTY JAIL?!?!
I'm drunk, I'm covered in pizza, and I'm watching Jurassic Park. I feel like you'll get this. xx
I still don't know why she was so offended when I emerged from the bathroom and told her my balls were now clean.
First non virgin Sunday. Bursts into flames.
Randomize
