Dude you just kept yelling "She was my first asain!" right in front of her.
When he took off his pants i accidently shouted "that is one small wiener," and thats when he left
you'd think someone with a dick that small would take what he could get
She's like Mona Lisa when she's intoxicated. No one understands her but they all think she's marvelous
I just deleted all the drug dealers from my phone, I guess this is growing up
Just because we buy weed together doesn't mean were a couple
I feel bad for the next person that's gonna live in my room. There's so much semen on the carpet
She Kept going around and squirting jello shots into guys mouths. That was her ice breaker.
I'm wearing your poncho, and only your poncho. I'm not getting pulled over like this.
I know this is really fun but I don't wanna glow anymore
There's 50 people in our house, none of them are wearing shirts. The keg has been relocated twice and our bathroom door is missing again...when will we ever learn?
I got my eyebrow ring humped out. How is that even possible?
Text me some of your sweat
She threw my purse across the room almost broke a lamp and this all started bc she forgot what an air mattress was
You're an adult now and it's your vagina. You should do what it or you wants.
I'm hungover and in a fort. And I hate you.
So many questions
Randomize
