Afterwards she curled up in my dog's bed and slept there all night
How mad was your dog?
I had sex with him, and then he gave me a $5 Starbucks gift card. Totally worth it
he was banged his ex for coke the whole time and is still the best guy so far this year. standards need to be raised.
At the ER. Dropped bottle lead to cut foot which led to me drunk hitting on doctors. Not going well.
Oh shut up man. Once the police get involved its every man for themself.
I'm gonna call it the Reunion Tour. Hooked up with two different ex girlfriends in one day...
Terrible hangover + phoenix airport + pizza hut....I think I might have entered one of the levels of hell.
FYI your bra is now hanging in the hallway as a trophy.
I just almost caught my floor on fire, then decided I could put it out with my knuckles! So I'm doing good!
One more sleep until playoffs, Canucks are back this year, you bet your ass I'm going to uphold the tradition of being the 90 lb girl that fights every hairy ass Bruins fan at BWW.
I just wanna be euthanized
Thas it
Also I think I set a new personal record. Definitely slept with him less than 45 minutes after meeting him. Oh god my life.
they gave me money. the money smells like weed. also they gave me weed
I am dancing alone in my bathroom because I was paranoid the neighbors were watching through the windows
Of course he did! You’ve seen my tits, you know he didn’t stand a chance!
Randomize
