im marching my happy ass in there and im not leaving until he cheats on his girlfriend!
i swear to god, this restaurant is playing a john tesh cover of a song from aladdin
TLC. RIGHT NOW. PRIMORDIAL TODDLERS.
Canada is now making docos about life in America. Its called Trailer Park Boys.
It's like my work doesn't even care about margarita mondays.
Even though he is humpbacked he is really good in bed.
how are you gonna miss the world cup? other than the olympics it's our last way to assert our dominance over China after this economic bull shit
Just know that as we speak i am injecting vodka into gushers
Your 'drink of the future' makes sense now- you feel it for atleast 10 hours into the future
I'm so high I would give anything in the world to be inside my lava lamp right now
I just replaced the poop spray with an air horn... Now we wait!
Will you fuck me while I eat my burrito though? I'm kind of hungry.
He also reminds me slightly of a pirate which i find strangely attractive
You licked my eyeball, you are officially cut off. If you just missed you can have a second chance on Friday.
well, shes hot as hell, but she does keep saying she's the president of the loch ness monster's fan club, so that's kinda a red flag...
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