remember about an hour ago when i told you i was never drinking again? i may or may not be mixing malibu with caprisun. just saying.
I skipped class, don't know why though bc all I did in the meantime was cook pancakes and watch infomercials..my life sucks
This is my last and worst hangover of the decade...I almost cherrish it
MRIs the morning after St. Patty's Day was a poor choice.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
do you ever get flashbacks of ppl you had sex with and just shudder at how gross they were/how drunk you were?
story of my life.
Her mom is home on her lunch break. Guess who's hiding In the Closet?
Drinking with mariachis at jimmy johns.
I just came so hard there were tears. Actual tears.
There's a black statue of liberty dancing on the side of the road. Please hold while I join him.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
after she rolled over and said 'i'm so glad you're like my gay best friend, love you' then left. did i just get friendzoned AFTER sex??
You told her that she shouldn't be allowed to wear clothes then when her roommate asked if you like her you said "no I just want to insert things into her"
I stand by it.
Someone's vagina was extra sandy cause the left side of my bed feels like the beach.
What I've learned from glowsticks: glowing things are not safe to eat
Can you send me the picture you took of me smoking a joint with the cat make-up on?
I'm too picky for internet dating and by picky I mean psycho.
Randomize