Come to the Burger King. We're waiting for you.
come outside for a special surprise it involves huge boobs
his penis looked like arnold from hey arnold. it was interesting.
bras are like tupperware for tits, keeps em fresh.
Just heard her singing at the school concert... I am honored my penis was touched by those pipes
I hated hipsters before it was mainstream.
My mom assumed I was crying because he was leaving. Figured that was better than explaining my eye's sensitivity to semen..
OMG HE JUST PUKED WITH THE DOOR OPEN WHILE DRIVING ON THE ROAD AND OMG WE NEED TO CHAT BUT NOT ATM CAUSE THERES PUKE ON MY PHONE
I'm still not a hundred percent.. I haven't shit anything solid in two days.. I have pulled my puker muscles and I can't take deep breaths cuz of other unidentified muscles/maybe heart attack
i had a long naked conversation with the cop on why is everything fun illegal
At one point, he came in to give her a pep talk, and then after he left, she just kept whispering his name into the toilet between heaves.
If you magically turned into a tall white gay guy, ignore this message. If not, then I'm sure someone has your fb password.
ayo
its like you know when i get waxed
I mean we all knew i was gonna get arrested eventually but shoplifting is lame so dont tell anyone. Well just let them assume public nudity or something
I have decided that I would still fuck Harrison Ford even though he is old as fuck now. Do you think it would kill him?
Most likely. But I bet he'd do a bang up job of it before he died.
He absolutely would.
Randomize
