Some guy said that sham wows were the same as regular shammys. needless to say you had to be restrained. you kept trying to 'slap chop' him.
I want to give my boyfriend great head for his birthday...can i practice on you?
i'm pretty sure i saw my life flash before my eyes when we ran a red light. i continued to drink and be the drunk backseat driver.
It was kind of like a train wreck, except alcohol would have improved the situation greatly.
Just invented taco cereal.
Pretty sure I just heard the turkey yell "don't put me in there" as it was going in the oven. way too high for this holiday.
Weekend plan is a big bag of dope, delivery food, Bollywood marathon and masterbating my dick raw.
When he texted me, I got a little wet. Until he asked me to get Jimmy Johns before I got to his house.
Bitch, he is not your friend and this is not Bravo. Get in this car before you get smacked
I have an interview tomorrow and listed you as a reference. If they call you, please don't tell them about the time I smuggled a Chalupa out of Taco Bell in my underwear.
She is dumping me if she doesn't get a ring by Valentines. So one more month of free sex and it will be back to the right hand.
now that we broke up we are playing hot potato with the cock ring.. Poor thing just needs a home
What's your opinion on eating ass? Just looking for a yes or no
I just noticed, at some point last night I got on iTunes and purchased over 100 classical piano songs.
You did an excessive amount of blow and then screamed "WHO THE FUCK NEEDS A LADDER?!" And then Mario style wall-jumped onto the roof. It was one of the most impressive things I've ever seen.
Randomize
