I gave up sex with dolphins for you.
ur plase or mine? lol
well if you don't learn how to spell, you may be at your place and I'll be at mine.
Cute you're picking friends over dick. I feel like this is the trailer for a lifetime movie.
Going to get tested monday. You're coming with. Bonding time, slut style.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
surprisingly organic peanut butter is not the best chaser
Are you complaining because you're getting too much sex to find the time to masturbate?
Well, when you say it like that it sounds silly.
If you do wifi you would be helping my penis out & real friends care about their friends penises...
I'm eating Doritos at 9am because last nights weed is just now starting to wear off
The only reason I know his name is because we wrote marriage vows in orange crayon on the back of a Walmart receipt.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I mean, I would have, but I couldn't come up with a logical reason to bring up oral sex during an orientation.
We are best friends because we can vomit simultaneously in the same toilet and not care
Are you aware that you called your mom to say hi before you dragged the random guy into bed last night?
Thanks for the hospitality last night.
You mean sex?
Yes....hospitality.
I have been adopted by a clan of drunken skinny dipping tourists.
Nope. I'm an adult now. I can successfully avoid to vomit in defiance of the porcelain god\n
Randomize