I like you better when you drink
I like you better when I drink too
I just accidentally stumbled into an AA meeting...I think its a sign
Nothing says I've got my life together like buying a jumbo bottle of 7$ wine in sweat pants on a monday night
Just proof I should've brought the airhorn with me to class.
As a matter of principle, I waited until noon to start the drinking binge.
plus shes a stripper, ive been with strippers, if you fuck this up your penis will never forgive you
I told him I'd put in a good word. And the word of the day is: NEGATIVE
He puked on the grill while the burgers were on. We had to go to taco bell
Come down here. We are watching people walk through the paper we taped in front of the elevator.
She interrupted us having sex in the tent by threatening to kill us if we "got cum on the lasanga."
Yeah, clearly. And then we can float around my room on Christmas themed inner tubes. And drink, I guess.
Someone younger than me just got married. Send help and vodka
You were a hurricane of blowjobs and glitter makeup. You came out of the closet and took the house down with it
Its like the floor is slow but life is fast?
I see you found the nyquil...
You came into the club around midnight with a carton of tropicana o.j. & said you were starting a revolution.
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