Apparently every Tri-Delt knows what I did and I am blacklisted from ever dating anyone in that house.
Well ya you lied, told her you cared, took her virginity and then broke up with her at Christies Toy Box.
I honestly thought the dildo was a nice parting gift.
you ended the night by relentlessly sucking on my hips bone and hand demanding milk. you said it was because you were a tiger
I walked into the garage and you were telling the bikes that you were not that drunk.
I like to think of them as justice herpes. She cheats on me and gets more than she bargained for.
I think we've had way too many heart to hearts in the Mc Donalds parking lot for this to be a healthy relationship
I cNt phones. tingles in my fingles. jingles
Do you have any pictures of me mounting animals that aren't on Facebook?
You climbed on top of the bar, shotgunned a 25oz fosters and screamed, Steve Irwin was a God amongst men.
He's sending me pics of Yellowstone scenery...the only thing I can think is "I would have sex next to that waterfall"
Btw had an awesome time last night. Found some blood on my shirt and ear but I'll chalk it up to the tequila shots.
Your brother's naked in the courtyard again. Just a head's up.
Just laying in bed with my vibrator eating cold tortillas and listening to Savage Garden.
Taco Bell is giving high school kids free tacos STEAL YOUR BROTHER'S WALLET I'LL BRING THE WEED.
So far 2 of my professors caught me looking at their dicks
Nah, just stick him in a closet with some cheetos, a blunt and soda. The darkness will calm him down until Mallory can be located.
Randomize
