Fuck, operation next sex victim is on as soon as i get back. Do not sleep with that red head, nobody likes accidental ginger babies.
Not only do prius' look terrible they are terrible to have sex in
you kept searching pizza on facebook and becoming a fan of each page dedicated to it
Is it bad that your cum tickles when I swallow it?
Currently bar hopping with 30 Navy SEALS. I know i'm safe but damn its hard to pick up chicks when you feel like a big pussy.
everyone contributed. i held her hair back, he rubbed my vag... it was a team effort.
I just realized I'm not towing a trailer. I thought this whole drive home I was towing a trailer. Wow too high
I turn the corner to find her walking in the front door in a tee-shirt, two different shoes and no pants. All she said to me was "I'm sad"
couldn't find my pants so i stole a pair of shorts from the passed out kid in the corner.
I stole an ensure out of their fridge and started chugging it. That was when Maria made me leave.
Only I could run tino my father in law while looking at condoms at Rite Aid. At 730 on a Thursday morning. I'm in trouble.
Well that's the first time I've woken up with wet jorts
By cross-referencing our messages & her Twitter feed, I've deduced that she was eating spaghetti the whole time we were sexting.
I have a boner in one of my pics with her which no one noticed.
Definitely thought about throwing up in the cat box since it's not as far to the bathroom..
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