What started out as Cougar hunting turned into whaling
Remember that one time i smeared period blood on your face?
I hate you
He asked if I wanted to blow his flute? Please call me and pretend there is a family emergency!!!
Definately going to wake up wondering what happened to the other half of my lip.
Well we didn't hook up. Maybe from his girlfriend's point of view, but not mine.
i talked to you about this last night, and you kept saying "he wants yo pusssaayyyyyy"
Your like the Mozart of blow jobs, you make every other girl seem like cheesy elevator music.
Your penis has nothing to do with my throat infection, sorry...
I think "I actually like giving blow jobs better" qualifies her as a keeper
Well at least I still have a burrito in my pocket.
Holy shit, did you actually CHOOSE to get hit by the alcohol truck last night?
He pretended his dick was a samurai sword and that he was slaying me with it is it bad I still wanted him to fuck me
I have no idea what to do with myself since we graduated.
I've just been napping and sexting all day.
dude if looks could fuck you two would've been naked in front of everybody
i want to say his dick was in it but not his heart
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