Do I need to let your sister outside to go pee or anything before I leave?
We have had massive layoffs this year, yet the guy who cant flush his shit seems to still have a job
it's a well known fact that sluts are attracted to bright colors
american apparel?
try lime green
I watched her choke out a bouncer with the broken strap from her purse, I think shes the one.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I could get a dump truck for 1000. Think of the possibilities.
At what point during this road trip should I let them know I've been drinking in the backseat the whole time and can't take my turn driving?
Literally best acid trip ever. Better than sex. At one point she looked over at me, started crying, holds up her hands and said "dinosaur tears of sadness". Craziest roommate ever.
I've smoked enough weed to put down a pony.
I went from looking for a bong to home decor in a 10 minute span. This is what being an adult is all about!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I couldn't really understand you because you were really quiet and I said "I don't know what you're saying, it's kind of a big mumble" and you said "that sums up my life"
Everything is covered in gelatin and pam cooking spray. Jesus be a shield.
Did you actually just quote Ace Ventura during a sext!?
You know it
Dammit now I have to marry you
How did your walk of shame include a trip to Walmart and how did you bump into the cop that arrested you last night there?
I can still taste your cum in my mouth and my in-laws are coming over. This should go well.
why did you kick open the doors at church screaming whos ready to party?
Randomize