You hook up with other guys, let him talk to other girls.
no
just shaved my legs at the gas station bathroom before going to the club. is that too ghetto?
new low.... made out with someone while peeing
My mom can no longer prohibit me from smoking pot..I sell to her boyfriend.
He def has a gf... But hes 7 feet tall and that superceeds any morality I may have.
This beer is not sobering me up at all
My complete lack of self respect has really improved my blow job technique
That's because "bed time" is my sex playlist. If you're trying to fall asleep use "nap time"
I am not exagerating when I say the thought "screw you future me" actually just went through my head
I told this guy in the dining hall that he's a hippie god and he's never made eating yogurt so sexy
I think you're my mermaid sister. Separated at birth, by sea.
I got drunk by myself and ended up listening to Beethoven in the dark.
Ur here to start shit and I'm here to light that shit on fire
Look, you're talking to the wrong girl here. Tacos>dick always and forever
Remember when I convinced you to watch me eat my sandwich just so you could reuse my plate and save us money on our water bill? I'm so ecofriendly when I'm high
Randomize
