I'm going to use my one free fuck up card tonight.
What'd you do?
Its more like what im about to do.
It took you an unbelievable amount of time to realize that your ass was on fire.
Trying not to fart in the comp lab is going to take everything i've got.
I wonder what gingers are like in bed...as awkward as their hair or just as unique as it...?
My own mom unfriended me on Facebook.
All I learned from that experience was that drinking scotch out of a crunk goblet was bad news.
i've hooked up with him and three of his roommates and not a single one of them knows about it..think its safe to say i found the silver lining in a boys inability to communicate
Is it just me or did a policeman park your car last night?
I just set the shake weight record at the bar. 20 mins of that crap and drinking beer through a straw will get the job done. I also bet the bartender 100 bucks I could go shot for shot with him. The date for that event is TBA.
Picking up hoes with my dad is going to make it a little harder, but ay, if thats how he wants to bond after 23 years, Ill give it a shot
so i EARNED it!?! i EARNED dying alone with cats!!?
Landen experienced Greenville for the first time last night. He was awaken by 2 cops and 4 EMS guys this morning in the bed of that truck that is for sale at the swashbuckler carwash, said he was trying to walk to waffle house... Greenville- 1, Landen- 0
I might attempt to pee into a cup while driving. I'll let you know how it goes.
Just took physics exam. I think this is one of those 'chuck it in the fuck-it bucket and become an art major' days
i woke up and couldnt remember who was in my bed and it was so dark.. i rolled over and started kissing him and feeling his face because hey... if the blind can see like that.. maybe i could too
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