I made out with a fat chick last night in a hot tub... btw I am breaking up with you
well you can't waste a boner
guy in the car over is getting some terrible road head. he just gave me a thumbs down when he noticed i was watching.
I got a 69.7 in accounting. I have this whole doing the bare minimum down to a science
Help. All alone. Room is. Changing colors. Dance party 2010, but without dancing.
dude they had a "sorry for partying" wall in their house which consisted if all the hospital bills, tickets, detox receipts and court orders they've gotten. The ENTIRE wall was covered.
It's alright she couldn't hear you. Her legs were over her ears
He told me to fuck off at some point in the night. I think it was right before he jumped out of a moving car trying to get to another bar and made Abby cry.
Haha jealous. If I could remember my dreams I'm pretty sure they would constantly be about being drunk in foreign countries
When you wake up so hungover that you don't even wanna cough for fear of vomiting... It's not gunna be a good day.
But I mean, have you ever just LOOKED at how majestic penises are? They are like ivory columns of pure wonder!
well he got me up crazy early but i got pizza for breakfast and an electric blanket to sleep with sooo he passed the one night stand test.
I still have your make up all over the inside of my thighs from the face sitting. Free tonight?
All I want for my birthday to be fingered and eat pizza
my dad walked in on me peeing into the trashcan in our kitchen last night at like 2am. wtf
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