you alive?
ya, the episode of maury where people are afraid of things are on, i had to keep livin
saw you walking with that piece of shit
and that piece of shit just read that
One thing i hate about playoff baseball: George Lopez
so i walked in, looked up the stairs and all i saw was smashed pumpkin, tube socks, and marinara sauce
so she finally agreed to being friends with benefits. not only did I take her virginity, when I woke up, she brought me French toast made with homemade bread in bed.
I worship thee.
The sweet smell of jungle juice and bad decisions is calling our name.
Family bonfire. I just discovered my cousin drank an entire bottle of champagne at the age of 7. I just got showed up.
Currently doing my walk of shame down a floating dock. No more guys who live on a boat EVER AGAIN
I guess I could probably fit that in between deep self reflection and teenage mutant ninja turtles
That's why you need to have them together. Katie started crying on the couch and she just gave her a tube of crackers and picked up a beer at the same time. She's like a goddess of making things chill
Omg my butt feels so much better. Those suppositories are magic. It feels like Jesus fingered me in my sleep.
I'm going to make you a sign to put on your penis to ward others off
I didn't want to shower, so I shaved my legs in the pool . That drunk .
So what your saying is you dont remember trying to hit a golf ball off my chest with a 9 iron?
Get over here and bring your drill!!! The strippers next door need help installing a stripper pole by their pool
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