Looks like an M-80 went off in a lb. of pastrami
Dude love is like an itch. You fuckin scratch it, then it itches more, then you scratch it and it itches more, and before you know it, there is semen everywhere.
you are insane
my mom hid the smirnoff from me. this is the most fucked up game of hide and seek EVER
Everyone was high fiveing on their a walks of shame home. God im gonna miss college life
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i'm reaslly not drunk enough to wtch the fat lesbian on my floor brng another fat lesbian dressed up as a bloody nurse into her room at 2am
just passed out again, this time at a subway. On a positive not they gave me a free sandwich, pretty sure out pity but at this point i don't care
Hooked up with 8 guys, puked 4 times, got a few bruises, and my face is still numb... I think this visit has truly impacted my college decision
nothing says "functioning mature adult" like sneaking beer out of your mom's fridge in a lunchbox
I'm sitting in the breakroom facing a very large sign that says "inappropriate workplace behaviors", and i can't help but feel like it is directed at me
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I basically have sex lined up for me in three different countries. If that's not a feat I don't know what is
You are in a fancy European city. The best way to truly experience the city is through Tinder
he said "I would have fucked you in the chipotle bathroom" and I can't get over how awesome that would've been
COME TO THE TOP OF THE MOUNTAIN AND I WILL GIVE YOU MY SAGE ADVICE.
Write this down so you can tell me in the morning. "That bartender needs to be in my mouth."
the guy had "bad bitches only" tattooed above his penis...
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