just wrote on a church. and then stalked a boy, by the way, i fucked him. him being your friend, also, love tacos.
he just said he'd buy the porn
its a step up from the last guy
Drinking in an igloo changes everything.
I looked at my arm when I woke up..I guess after 8 tally marks I said fuck it and wrote "too much"
just spent about 3 1/2 hours looking for a dollar so I can buy weed.
suggestion: become a stripper.
SHE has hooked up with both me and my sister. I don't even know what to say. If she goes for my parents next I may have to kill her
Just tried to use the bottle of Sprite in my car as mouthwash to get the taste of puke out of my mouth- it's half vodka. Puked again. Thanks man.
Look dude I'm sorry I used your bong to snorkel in my bathtub last night
My roomate asked me why she found condoms in the pringles container. I don't know what to tell her
I thought that wasn't a thing ever since she showed you her vag on the dance floor
The rest of the concert I just stared at the lights and didn't really listen to the music cuz I was trying to make sure my brain still worked cuz my face was numb and I couldn't move... Yeah I'm not a weed brownie person
I could go for watching some naked price is right. Looks like a good time to me.
i really need to shower, but i don't want to take off my bra and lose my cleavage. the struggle
I swear to the sweet baby jesus I didn't fill your freezer with salsa and my little pony toys, but I didn't stop them either.
OMG LOOK AT THAT PIECE OF MAN
I haven’t trained for this.
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