it cannot be done, he is unbreakable.
What?
..he cannot be seduced..she had to have roofied him.
Details.
I walked up to her and said hello and wanted to ask her if she had fun last night... she asked me if we had met before.
last night i found where hot topic managers go to die after they get fired.
Just witnessed a walk of shame by a guy in a half gorilla suit. It's going to be a good day.
Sign #1 that I'm not ready to be a mother: I'm shopping for "maternity fishnets".
Second night back. Go to house party and played ring of fire. Me plus five other people completely naked. College wins.. It's going to be a long semester
don't judge, it's breakfast wine Wednesday.
How many stacks you been grindin gangsta?
omg mom no
It's so blood brotha crip what be good
And I'm still awake, and you left me. Like the guy on Jurassic Park, that jumped out of the car expecting me to save myself while there is a man eating T-rex ready to tear my ass apart except theres a mathematician and paleontologist there to save me because they are bad asses.
he stopped talking to me, quit his job, moved out of the province and then told me it was "no big" when I called him apologizing...
How is it that I, the only one that didn't drink last night, was the only one puking out the car window?
That isn't the worst part. It got a bazillion times more awkward when he read me a poem he wrote about his dead cat.
Congrats you've received dick pics from an Olympic silver medalist
How naked do you want me to be?
She and I had some intense sexual tension earlier when she dumped a package of apple straws all over my body.
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