Let's just say there is a bloody hand print above my bed and it's not mine. Literally.
Only in Montana can you find Septic Services that would display "Christian owned and operated" on the side of the truck. I'm oddly going to miss this state.
so I found out that he is the older brother of a friend of mine from high school
awkward
no it got awkward about 40mins later when he invited me to stay the night...with him and his girlfriend.
Am I the only person who thinks Megan Fox looks totally like a Thai lady boy with a serious tanning bed fix?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Please don't call me names while I'm carrying your child.
Did you know the Dallas Cowboy cheerleaders have an exercise show ON Demand? Yeah, I had a lonely night
I'll throw in a blow job for your kind ways. Or another booty call. I'm poor and not very imaginative. This is all I have to offer- the unicorn like wonders of my vagina.
Im embracing the luau theme and maybe bringing a kiddie pool filled with alcohol. Im also embracing the high probability I will not remember this night.
Man, I wish they all looked like that. Your vagina deserves to have a nice frame around it, and God's signature at the bottom.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I want what they have, but in the meantime I have a whole bottle of rum to which I'm quite devoted
I am incapable of maintaining a guy's interest in me. It's like erectile dysfunction but with feelings
He was literally going down on me and giving me a foot rub AT THE SAME TIME. What more can I ask for?
I swear to god....if you can give yourself a brazilian you can take a fucking bullet
I've seen you go skiing on a Tuesday, but you think you're too good for TGI Friday's?
you walked into the party, and all you had on was your left sock... literally.
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