That's intense
im trying not to drink and cry in the same night anymore. i'll let you know how it goes
Considering the last guy I had sex with was gay, this was a huge improvement.
He bought me Ben & Jerrys and then apologized for the fact that he was going to fall asleep before we could have sex
Oh and I guess I added our cab driver on Facebook. He has "liked" every single one of my beach pictures. Kill me now.
I just entered us to win a trip to Vegas for spring break. GET YOUR VAGINA READY FOR THE ULTIMATE DICK HUNT!
We played alot of beer pong and ventured into the woods with tiki torches
Sorry blacked out and lost my phone. Judging by the looks of my body I fought a cat and fell into a bush.
I'm petty sure you said "hold on let me make my nipples hard, they look better"
Add caroling to the list of things we need to do in an elevator
We need a fire pit. Meat. And a keg.I mean like a cow we just carve from. And cook it. We can use the milk from the udder to make White Russians
Paying for my weed with Mike's hard lemonade freezables. The perks of having a gay dealer
Great litmus test for what a useless adult you are: amount of shame you feel while eating a coffee cup of Fruity Pebbles
I just realized I had arrested my one night stand from last night...
i'm currently watching a guy eat a bunch of cacti and i have lost all faith in humanity
**cactuseses
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