You smell like stripper and shame
he said "you're pretty" then i made out with him. thats all it took
Walk of shame... his parents made me go to church with them first. in my club top sweat pants and slippers. i just slapped god in the face
i convinced her i was a yoga teacher by showing her some warm-ups my high school track coach made up
I was told u were the one who could explain to me why i woke up in the running shower, still in my dress and heels
You do realize that you're sleeping with a man who is part of a gay harem, right?
I'm so tired of waking up with my bed full of deli meats.
I think the guy I was trying to dance with was an undercover cop...
So high I started thinking my desktop picture of a cat was too erotic for the workplace.
im watching blue is the warmest color at the music box and this dude is literally masturbating 3 feet in front of me
Idk man, we spent like 20 mins arguing about the moral ambiguity of fucking in someone else's car
I'm asking you this because you're my dad....is coke a drug I should try?
Wait I can't come yet Mr. Brightside is playing
ok i defs just took my shirt off in the middle of a frat party though so keep me updated
Yeah, but having a dick this size has ruined 3 marriages.
I got a gay guy to motorboat me. These tits could change the world, I'm telling you.
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