he thinks he's going to hurt your feelings
He can't hurt my feelings
I don't have feelings.
Taking a 35 year old indonesian home, only in vegas ;-)
i guess its not very common for a paramedic to have to revive someone who was struck by a falling shampoo bottle while getting off from the bathtub faucet.
i just dont know how to see an unattractive person as more than a friend
Is it weird for a girl to post pictures of her dildo no facebook?
we went through the mcdonalds drive through and you asked for a free sample of their fries to see how you liked them.
i just opened the overnight bag i packed at 2am last night. Apparently all i thought id need was a handful of quarters, mascara and one sock
I was born in the year of the cock... How fitting.
she was in the bathroom washing her eye makeup off with hand sanitizer.
Drunk Tina signed up to be part of the crew team and got a text from the captain telling her there's practice tomorrow. Wtf
Someone shat in our tub last night. I'm not pointing fingers but you priors make you a prime suspect.
There are more dirty dishes in my bed then in the kitchen. Have I lost at life?
Tell me how you feel about belly buttons
I've had more orgasms than showers this week.
I’m good. I learned that a guy ate the mushrooms that were growing out of his toilet, so there’s that.
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