So I'm at the Chevron by your house. I need a condom and a couch.
Together?
Preferably.
they have pregnancy tests at the dollar store
I feel like that is one of those things that you should not cheap out on.
We should make a goal to do one active thing a day, even if its like throwing a ball
And by ball i mean playing catch. Beer pong does not count as an activity
She called me in the morning crying, but I was busy cleaning up bird guts, very hungover. It was a very surreal morning.
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Ya well here is the deal with last night, it was the Biggest shit show we have ever co-stared in.
If I get over there and the april fools joke is that there's no HBO, I'm setting fire to the place.
Thank you. Next to bondage, soft American Apparel t-shirts are the best things you've taught me about.
Master Skywalker, there are too many of them. What am I going to do?
Hit on the one in the red shorts. The thirst is strong with this one.
Getting drunk in an Applebee's pray for me
Lord god protect this child
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The last thing I remember is goading each other into a vodka-chugging competition.
I fell asleep completely naked, standing up with my arms and head in the freezer
We were watchin sharknado and we hooked up while I had the Donald Trump shirt on. She said she felt like he was staring at her
I sharted in my christmas pjs :(
I just want an early 40-something dude who is vaguely unencumbered, professionally driven and wants to put me in a ball gag.
So...#1 on my TO DO list for college is to fuck someone somewhere in the stadium during the homecoming game...you down?
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