it was the worst sex ever in the history of sex. i mean ever. and he thought he was great. actually told me he was the best id ever had...what was i supposed to say? lol...i've had better times by myself. seriously.
This ain't no lie cnn says sonny n cher's dtr chastity is going to have sex reassignment surgery to become a man named chaz
Not surprised. I always thought Cher was a very passable post op transexual.
New boss looks like john cusack in a collar. Hot. Why do i always want to have sex with priests?
my mom hid the smirnoff from me. this is the most fucked up game of hide and seek EVER
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He just did a 33 second keg stand with a fractured leg, busted chin and chipped teeth from running into a parked car after winning a race.
Today I learned you can't titshake with a corset on.
i think my love is proven by the fact that i still want to have sex with you after this conversation
just saw someone in just a bathrobe not even tied shut run to the bathroom with a facefull of cum. Someone had a good night
This was just another one of those days you wished you had a penis-size indicator instead of wasting your time isn't it?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
That's the kind of break up sex that keeps couples together. Damn.
Shoot me. Oh my god shoot me. My moms ex "likes assholes"
If I ever look like I'm about to have a repeat of last night, hit me. Just smack me as hard as you can.
We got kicked out of yet another strip club because your mom wanted to "show these kiddies how it's done"
Your "whiskey dick" is glorious but also terrifying
She made me pour olive oil on her.
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