i just walked outside for a cigarette and three men walked by in glitter heels and gold shiny thongs. god i love chicago
On my way, I hope you have alcohol for me to blame stuff on...
I felt like I was in a real life creepy Myspace message. "girl u cute" ... "girl u got a really nice smile"
My drug dealer is spending the weekend in my studio apartment. I feel like I've crossed a line that should never be crossed.
I just want to apologize for screaming when I saw you the other day. It's just that you looked really gross and I was high.
I'd say the best part of the party was when you screamed to everyone that you were gettin dome on the reg
We're stealing the mannequin. He's my new swimming partner.
That was like me applying to a law school drunk at 5 am
Hahaha. That's funny.
But I got an 18k dollar per year scholarship
Wow. I feel like a bad friend. My fuckbuddy wished you a happy birthday before I did. The reality of that just hit me.
I'm high. Everything has a 45° angle. That is as far as my eyes open
You're 21st was epic. I woke up at 6 a.m. on the floating beer pong table in the pool with a beer still in hand. Didn't even spill any
last thing I remember is yelling 'sit on my face' through a traffic cone
the quiet that you are hearing is a silent suggestion that you should go fuck yourself
I swear to god if you keep eating my cats food drunk I am going to kick you out of our apartment.
Honestly, I am sitting in my room watching Ciara videos and thinking I am super jealous of how she rides it.
Randomize
