I think scott just propositioned me for sex
Guess what? I had way too much to drink today. I'm properly wasted. Doing chores and playing video games while drunk. It's the nexus of stupidity and responsibility.
I caved and texted him. But it's strictly drug dealing business so it doesn't count.
I told her the white crusty stuff on my boxers was frosting not cum. She seemed MORE grossed out then
You would get kicked out of the study lounge for being drunk the monday of finals week
I just wanted to let you know that this afternoon I took a piss at the same toliet you drank out of on New Years Eve.
I love that my brother has just convinced my dad that smoking a blunt it an "unspoken family tradition"
Just smoked out of an apple with Steve Jobs. I love Halloween.
He said in a slur "I go so hard, even when I..." and cut himself off by projectile vomiting all over the ice luge.
Stop leaving me alone with my ex boyfriends after keg challenges. Woke up in his bed covered in what you think would be cum. No...toothpaste. He left a note. "Be home at four. Don't be here when I get back."
If I had really thought it through, I would have bought some Depends, popped one on and made this night my bitch.
Walking in on a gay threesome, with a girl in the corner watching and taking vid is a reason to not only knock, but to never go to Savannah.
How many Wendy's frosties do you think it would take to fill a bathtub?
After we finished having phone sex he proceeded to serenade me with Ave Maria. It was magical.
This morning we had sex while he was wearing a full length fur jacket and sunglasses... I wasn't even phased
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