Cool, I just put that together. I didn't know if using a tie-died sub machinegun was too crazy
Im sending over a girl who thinks youre in the next twilight movie
your the best winggirl ever
I don't remember him, but he's saved in my phone as "uh oh zbt"
Ohhh, TODAY your worried. Becasue last weekend when we warned you about her you said "shes too hot to have herpes."
I don't care how hot he got, I can't get past the PTSD flashbacks of the first time he fingered me
So awkward... The newspaper lady just caught me sitting stoned in my driveway at 5 am and asked if I was okay. I'm way better than ok right now
I've decided I'm peeing in a solo cup then throwing it on his windshield. It's official. He called the cops 4 times in our first week at the house. He deserves it, right?
say 'i' if you broke up a fight involving your father at TD bank today....
I just need a text that says "put that food down bitch" and then maybe I'll lose water weight through tears
The light burnt out and he thinks the power is out in the whole house. He is cooking a hog dog over two candles. I'm gonna see if he'll make me one
It sounds like drunken magic sprinkled w narcotics
Definitely broke my toe and messed up my knee walking back. Drink hitch hiking should never happen again.
Just got offered bathroom sex. I've never been more flattered.
I just made mac at 3:10 am... My life is falling apart...
I better get weekly incoherent text messages or I will assume something is wrong.
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