so he reminded me it was our 9 month anniversary and then said "we could've had a baby by now"
Nothin says happy bday jesus like a shot with your loved ones.
i will pay you if you can come get me. he just suggested that we would have a hockey themed wedding.
I suppose drinking a cosmo at lunch alone can't look good but I mean... sometimes it's just necessary
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
This girl has a mullet weave. I missed oakland.
Is there really anything more beautiful than opening a fresh box of wine on a Friday afternoon?
Either I spilled whiskey on my boobs last night or they are fermenting. Not concerned in the slightest
I woke up because a stranger was shoving an already lit bowl into my mouth. Spring break is awesome
It's been so long that I've occasionally forgotten I own a vagina
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I may have played more drinking games with my family this last week than all of freshman year...
Y'all best leave this "I can only have a couple drinks" shit at the door. U don't drive to Yukon to have a shot. I'm getting u fuckers drunk.
I should have bailed a long time ago. I mean, he has a bible verse-a-day app next to his dick pics in his phone.
Your dog took my vibrator out to the yard
He and I didn't so much date, as watch cartoons and go down on each other.
I just want to get drunk and not have to worry about you leaving me at the bar.
Randomize