I assumed she put out when I heard her friend call her "dickbutt"
I swear to god he was trying to crawl under my door last night muttering "I'm Alex Mac! I'm Alex Mac!"
his status popped up and said 'probably going to jail.' it took everything i had not to press the like button
As of tonight I have officially had sex during every Disney movie.
im pretty sure thats the first step to being a pedafile
Just passed on a threesome. I'm too old for that kind of morning after.
I think he'd cut a tree down for me. He's from North Dakota. That's something hot guys do there, right?
Not even close. I woke up in the bed of Codys truck. Wrapped up in a sleeping bed, using a stuffed alligator as a pillow. And Alex was laying naked beside me. Not to mention I wasn't wearing the clothes I got there in.
She was crying, alone at a college bar. It would have been rude NOT to try and show my penis to her.
The man who lives downstairs is fluent in Russian, and also a playboy. You should meet.
Then mom squeezed my boob and said, "Dad would go nuts if I had these..."
currently buying a pregnancy test while braless so happy november to you too
I'm pretty sure that's why we have such good sex because we are secretly trying to kill each other
He just used the word frick. Is that a possible red flag?
I am in no place to make rational decisions, but right now i want you inside me
Why would you ask him if you could lick his chest?
He has a very lickable chest
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