Do you still have your period?
Making my coffee at work this morning let out a jack daniels fark. Turn around and see the quiet guy making his breakfast
She really thought E.D. was a sexually position.
So chef boyardee smells exactly the same after you throw it up
i literally discovered the exact same thing last week. i had the lasagna one
ravioli
it's fine if we fail the bar, we were never going to satisfy the moral character requirement anyway
I don't care. I'm going to fuck John's friend and it's all your fault.
he ate me out like he was chugging a beer.
I have no idea, but there's a bus parked in front of my house and like 6 texts saying im gonna prove my love. this is either really really awesome or really really bad.
This tiny cat is tiny breathing with her tiny lungs and im having a tiny freak out. Like those lungs have to be super tiny.
I put chex mix in your purse for when you get hungry while doing your walk of shame tomorrow!
Selling our snow shovel to buy more beer. Not your brightest idea.
This is classic penis vs brain.
some dude just accurately guessed my height and bra size.. that is cup AND inches around. creepy, yet impressive
Seriously I can't get a booty call for some baked goods.
Nxt time we drink that much, we'll have to hide the crayons. Crayola-ing a mural on the living room wall wasnt the brightest idea, but it sure is classy. Right?
Randomize
