so... another position just opened up(704) Oh really?(704) Is it John's?(704) Or did you find a new way to take a penis?
You and i never got to the, we dont care what we look like friend-stage. you know? like not brushing your teeth stage.
sorry im really high
thats the only time ive ever had sloppy firsts
There is somethin about your sexuality that makes my dick do jumping jacks when I see you
I just bought a CD. I feel like a traitor to my generation.
just threw the rents a curveball by making french toast and bacon when i came home sober. good luck tellin when im high/drunk now.
I'm sorry that spending new years with you was fucking my boyfriend in your bathroom multiple times
New plan for Halloween: you dress as Waldo, I'll dress as Carmen San Diego. We can just hide in a closet drinking till someone finds us.
I like literally had a visual image of his penis going into your soul
umm, I just masturbated to old Justin timberlake on MTV jams. in need of dick ASAP
I think I have to break up with him. I just cried, not moaned, screamed, etc, cried, with tears of sadness and disappointment when I came.
In my defense, who let the drunk girl run around with a sack of broken glass unsupervise?
So I was walking to the bathroom and some random dude threw up while walking towards me. He kept eye contact the entire time and didn't stop moving.
I was legit late to work one day Bc it took me so long to get a good nude
You came in yelling "I'm el scorcho" and then axe can flamethrowered my dresser. Awesomeness aside, you owe me a new dresser.
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