The ratio was 19 to 1 and the 1 was lauren so it didn't even count.
I just spent all my babysitting money on red cups and beer.
People still let you watch their kids?
Dude its barely eleven am and there is already a firetruck and ambulance at the shamrock...happy st paddys day
and i had to drink on "never have i ever unsuccessfully tried to seduce a virgin ginger"
Ok everyone, the frat server is slow because of the 11 TB of porn on there. Either clean out your partition by Sunday or it will be erased. Thanks for your help.
I think drinking White Russians at half past four in the afternoon is perfectly acceptable. I'd bought a LOT of milk and cream that needs to be used up. Resourceful, check, fuckable, check. You have a great girlfriend here pal.
I dreampt that we were shooting zombies while we having sex. Is that normal?
you just missed a great speech in which i almost coined the term "ass-ian" as in "my vaginal and ass-ian regions are no longer safe"
God please dont post that to facebook.
drunk snapchatting is the worst, because i woke up with great pictures of my tits saved to my memories and no idea who i sent them to
He just chose domino's over sex. ARE YOU KIDDING ME?
I told him I was studying his body for art, so now I have to actually do a drawing of him to not look like a creep and so we can hook up again.
Did u guys seriously make a betting pool on when im going to get pregnant???
Yep, wanna bid?
A girl I had a drunken hook up with is on interventon right now
Next time I think it’s a good idea to hook up with any of your wife’s family members or friends just kick me in my dick
Bro I rebuilt the dungeon in animal crossing visit me
Broooo
Randomize
