Brandon just fucked that chick! I tried to warn him but T9 said she had "puppy roses" instead of "pussy sores"
i took it, then realized you live 3 ours away. but if you start driving now, im almost positive I'll still be hard
I'm sitting next to some random guy in a gorilla suit drinking out of a bottle of vodka.
He's majoring in Religion
All three shower stalls were filled with couples fucking and then someone yelled "switch" and... We switched
That man deserves a slow clap... He defied the power of the vagina
I know we said we never would. But try fucking a fat guy. He put in so much more effort and then made me waffles.
How about we just fuck in random places all around campus, and skip the boring relationship part?
How about to stay friends we only have sex on our birthdays. Maybe national holidays too. And days we get really drunk. Wanna get really drunk?
I believe the question is can one ever have too many vibrators?
So, my eyeglasses somehow ended up in my nightstand drawer and they're covered in lube.
Your boyfriend being in jail is really helping my social life! #GotASingleDrinkingBuddyAgain
sometimes you just have to listen to beyonce and cry. that's how life works
We have massive handle of kettle and a rack of hi life
That's the happiest ive ever been at 7:48 am....
We just started our own DARE program: Drugs are really enjoyable.
2020 sucks, I want a refund
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