I'm convinced that Kathy Griffin and Andy Dick are the same person...
i think our first tip to leave should have been when we saw the drinks were coming out of a gas can
i just entered cocaine into my calorie counter.
Thank god i puked near the cancer center. makes me look like a chemo patient
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Also, hurry up because I don't like drinking alone. I'm still doing it, but I don't like it.
Yuck. My throat feels like someone chucked a couple of Maltov cocktails down it and finished it off with a super soaker filled with Jameson.
This weekend I forgot a cup, so I drank my wine out of a Pringles can. So classy. You would have been so proud.
Fucking holidays. How do I have this many men who want to fuck me and none of them are available when I'm ready to blow my top?
You have no idea the kind of bodily contortions I had to do to access your neighbor's WIFI
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We took your mom out drinking and we wound up winning 18 games of Flip Cup. You have amazing genetics.
I threw up in bed last night and tried cleaning it with oldspice and baby powder
I know it's anime porn but I promise you the guy looks like Fred Durst
We should leave before they realize I dumped a bowl of Fritos in your bag just in case I got hungry
Why did two squirrels just run out from behind the couch?
About that.
It’s awful. They need to open the bars. I’m now trolling grocery stores looking for dick
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