Just mADE A PArabola og urine
found a dugout with weed in it in dad's car. decided to top up the weed compartment with salvia. for fun.
I didn't notice until this morning that he had a six inch RAT TAIL...
I just found a Chris Hansen soundboard online, care to guess what I'll be doing all day?
Just met someone from Jersey. No fist pumps or jagerbombs. Kind of disappointed...
Some girl at the bar was showing us her chipped tooth as a pick up line.
Um...any recollection of peeing in the pantry
With a few pieces of metal and duct tape and a bong was created
My stripper pole led lights flash with the sound so it's awsome with music
Whatever I'm getting wasted, my costume's bomb, and there's a good chance I'm getting laid. Not letting stupidity ruin my night!
Last year I got a dildo in the mail on my birthday. Today it was just a credit card bill. Sadface.
Blacked-in to me, shirtless, giving myself finger guns in the mirror and rapping "stacks in the club stacks stacks in the club."
It was 3 am when she drunkenly tried to deep-fry a banana.
How'd she do that?
i bet he makes cat noises to excite himself.
If you fucking touch my phone and text people, drunk or sober, ever again, i will shove a swizle stick up your pee hole.
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