Nevermine. I'm just going to tell you on Myspace with a glitter graphic.
She’s leaving for college so I made her a gift basket with all the essentials. You know- Ramen, a 12 pack of PBR, some leftover Plan B pills and a laminated business card for a good lawyer. Damn I’m a good big sister.
there should be a national holiday dedicated to how high i am
Just had to have the guy at Sprint clear the dried cum out of the trackball on my Blackberry. Wonder if that happens to him often.
i found him! he's on the front porch using a bag of potting soil as a pillow. i forgot i left him there.
I was tackling you out of excitement
Yeah thank goodness the stripper pole was there to break my fall.
Apprently after I bit that bouncer, it all went down hill.
Decided in my tanked state last night purchase 2 weeks worth of xanax, so I can guess my way thru this week and finals. Soberly, I decided it would be a great way to test my knowledge of finance.
If I could drive and get you Starbucks I would... But that's probably not a good idea. On account of the drugs.
Our DD painted my costume on me for tonight. The strippers have been teaching him how to paint costumes.
she hacked my macbook and downloaded an illegal version of the original pokemon red, completely nude in my computer chair. there were several levels of hornyness existing all at once
Also, being stuck with my family all week has made it very clear that I need to be drunk and I need to be fucked pronto
We broke into the kitchen, stole cooking aprons, and wore them on the dance floor.
he fell asleep naked and all I'm doing is staring at his weird balls
We can have bacon on the roof while tanning
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