the bulge in his pants is not junk. its hair. trust.
When she sits down, she uses her fat rolls like an arm rest.
operation have a gay friend backfired
either i blacked out mid-sex but remember the beginning and end, or he really only lasted a couple of minutes
I woke up to a bag of pies and a lot of questions
In the middle of having sex, she said "if we continue, we're dating." I then pulled out and sat in the corner, naked. I deserve a Medal of Honor.
I know this request is pointless but you two please try to keep the drinking and drug use to a minimal, I have bail money so write my number on your arm and a "if found call", wear a life jacket and act like a responsible 28 year old please.
I just tried to roll over and fell off the bed. I think that is the beds way of kicking me out
At this point, I'd date an ax murderer. So long as he doesn't cry all the time, have ED, or leave me with his unspayed cat. My list of requirements is becoming increasingly specific.
All im saying is that my face might fall off.
I'm just saying, if you haven't been dropped off at a Wawa at 5:30 in the morning by 3 cop cars, you're missing out
I never thought I could be this turned on by a man wearing racoon tails.
this is a mass text: the cage has been opened. repeat, the cage has been opened. a search party will be organized. you are all sloppy bitches. that is all.
Sober sex is weird like I didn't expect this when I got clean
Rich men love me! I remind them of their trophy wife!!!
Randomize
