She was drunk and kept trying to talk while I was in her mouth. It sounded like the teacher from a Charlie Brown cartoon!
i thought she was just hairy. i didn't know she was also a man.
Who keeps a bong in their car??
Kids who graduated high school two weeks ago.
i wish my apartment had room service that i didn't have to pay for.
the only reason he called me tonight was because I fertilized his crops on farmville.
my entire walk over here no one looked in my eyes. Period Boobs are BAACKKK.
i told him my stretch marks were scars from a jellyfish sting........he totally bought it
i saw like six of her guido cousins in the jersey shore trailer alone. her family is having a dinner party for the premiere tonight.
Well, we missed our public lewdness court date. Looks like were going to jail in Alabama ...
He walked into my room in the middle of the night, whispered something about the patriot act, and took my tv.
I just stabbed open a can of Spaghetti Os with a spork. Who says I cant take care of myself?
She said she wouldn't get out of hand. When the cops showed up she jumped off the 4ft high porch and fell into a ditch. She then buried herself because she was wearing light pants and though the light from the cops flashlights would reflect off her pants. We couldn't find her for 40 minutes.
Grandma cant send me 4 lbs of gummi bears and expect me not to soak them in some sort of alcohol
I'd give my right arm to start my period. My right arm. Thats more significant then my left.
did i tell you guys i finally 69’d for the first time last night? just thought the group chat should know.
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