I meant the "stage" gay, Not the "bend me over and call me Gary" gay.
he said he wished he had more hands so he could firmly hold my boobs.
Kay wants to put chicklets in our cooters to make beavers and take pix captioned Got Wood? Taking public transit does scary things to her.
i slept with her, drove her to her sisters house to babysit, and then drove around the block where i met her sister and had sex with her in my van. I'm family Friendly!
Renamed my iPod as 'the titantic' so when I plug it in it's says 'the titantic is syncing.'
I just ate nachos topless with a fork. Live with meeee
Easy for you to say! His first impression of you isn't the drunk girl in a turtle costume who got hit by a car!
He wore a Medeval Times crown while I gave him a BJ
I ended up naked in a pond with you-know-who and your saying your a good babysitter? Dick.
It's hard to be judgmental of others when you are wearing silver pleather.
Dude, he's legal now. You could not pry me from his dick with the jaws of life.
You were naked with a chalice of Skittles vodka, singing along to Les Miserables.
if i dont text back till morning its cause i turned my phone off and changed my password to something i wont remember to stop myself from drunk texting...RESPONSIBILITY
Oh honey. I will not JUST be drunk. I will be spring break drunk. Spectacularly hammered. It will be glorious for all watching and embarrassing for anyone that has to drag me to bed.
1. I drank goldschlager 2. I fell in a bathtub and hit my head (hard) on a soap dish. 2. I sat in said bathtub talking to a random stranger on vacation from wyoming (who i met at a 711 looking for taquitos) for almost an hour. 3. We got kicked out of said bathtub by owner of bathtub. 4. We had sex.
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