I like complaining with weaving words and complex sentences. It makes me seem more sophisticated and less bitchy.
yes, the chronicles of narnia is exactly what happens when you do crack inside of a wardrobe.
She stopped mid-blowjob to introduce herself to us
She's riding a tiny four-wheeler and has a Dos Equis in her hand. I at least have to meet her.
Houston, we have a squirter
This honesty session brought to you by jagermeister inc.
You'd be amazed at how difficult it is to find pics of the helicopter dick
I am very proud of your internet skills
He's basically wearing those Nike boner sweatpants. It's hard not to jump him. How has your day been?
Those mornings you wake up with a Barbie tramp stamp are the mornings that are the that are going to make me miss this place
We wore fake mustaches and shirts that said team mustache ride to a party we weren't even invited to
he wears New Balance sneakers on a regular basis, did you really expect the sex to be more than decent?
I'm beginning to think that women just have dogs at home as an excuse to leave ASAP after hooking up, without sounding like a typical guy.
Seriously insulted!! You can not share my dick pick with your gay brother. He won't quit poking me on fb
I slept awesome next to you. You're like an electric blanket that I can have morning sex with.
Omg drank too much. Threw up in my Santa hat on the train and then of course it leaked all over me.
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