....ANDDD I just became confused during sexting and sent my mother a text describing a "porno-worthy cum shot."
Wow, being the totally hot and slutty looking 30 year old lady on the dance floor does NOT necessarily mean that she has skills in bed.
Want updates from david's night out drinking? If so text back DAVID to this number. Std rates apply.
entire chemistry final was about beer... i actually might miss this place
Okay, good. And if you have one of those portable strip poles that would be nice too.
Is it penis luge time yet?
I got my project done and a booty call in all before 1am. I'm a professional college kid.
and after i failed the breathalyzer i said to the cop "i've never been very good at tests"....
My eyes feel like they're throwing up and I am the only human on campus
im glad im back to a point in my life where i have enough sex to sometimes be offered and be like naw im good.
I see myself subsisting on tequila for the next several days.
About to wash down a xan with an iced pumpkin spiced latte from starbs and I feel like I've never lived up to my stereotype so much at one time
I'm currently using a band-aid to cover my bar stamp from last night while I ask my professor for an extension. That's a sign of getting more responsible, right?
I just remembered I casually gave you a tour of the house after we boned...lol
I woke up under the kitchen table. Andy is cursing out Joe Exotic's name in between heaves in the bathroom. Jay is trying to sleep w/ a shirt tied over his eyes. Lena and Brad braved the sun to go get bloody mary supplies and food. I'd say the Tiger King drinking game was a success.
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