addddeeerrraaaallll.
ok i'm not sure if that was a success statement or a cry for help.
Just found out that I was singing john legend songs as I threw up last night. Quality.
Highlight of the day: realizing the man in the car next to mine was getting road head... at 2:45pm... nicely done sir, nicely done.
It's going to be great. They guy at the store said 3 shots and you won't be able to feel your face or stop smiling.
Frozen waffles and wine. Loneliness-party of one
You tried to convince me you were sober by doing jumping jacks. For an hour.
There's going to be a pool, lightsabers and alcohol. What could go wrong?!
I think ppl see us as an unstoppable drunken force
its sad im about to start saving up for how drunk i need to be for the holidays
1 tequila 2 tequila 3 tequila, floor.
*roof
Weekend plan is a big bag of dope, delivery food, Bollywood marathon and masterbating my dick raw.
You were dancing with a coffee pot of rum in one hand and a joint in the other. So that should explain everything.
Made out with a mannequin all morning in cpr training, so im ready to party
My liver is whispering mean things about me to my kidneys. It's a fucking miracle I'm not hungover. Lol
I once went to target high on hydrocodone. I assure you, they can handle unrespectable.
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