dude. I'm so drunk.
pete, this is bryce's mom
I can't wait to have my cock in your ass
pete, this is still bryce's mom
we were having sex in the shower and he dropped me. try explaining THAT to your concerned little brother
I'm sorry, but there's just something about mesh over nipples that irks me.
So can I buy you a drink sometime?
Sure, but make it a double, I'm drinking for two these days.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
so he came over for the first time and i completely forgot i had pictures of him printed out from facebook on my wall and a newspaper article with him in it.. you can guess that it lead for an awkward situation.
So i've def seen the girl running for student body VP getting fingered in a bar.
I envy the lives of milf's kids, the little kid grabs her tits and she just laughs and says not now
I was very proud of myself that day. I had an awesome time. I don't care if I negatively impacted others.
Finally hooked up w/ that yoga instructor chick. Got a little more than I expected. Like a full on bush more than I expected. How do you tell a girl that her bush scares you?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He changed his profile picture to him as a baby. Definitely a turn off. This will help in my "don't-be-a-slut-endeavors"
I just ate 6 cheeseburgers with some homeless guy. Pretty epic.
All I know is that at 4 am I was walking down the street in my bra and his shorts and Im pretty sure I passed my grandma on her morning walk.
Just saw a rice crispy commercial and got emotional. I need to go home.
First day back to class and I have already pulled out the hard liquor
ill drive you to the airport today if we can have sex first
i left yesterday
ill pick you up from the airport on sunday if we can have sex after
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