wake up i wanna do it froggy style
I think you should know he took my pants (buttons and zippers included) and my thong off with his mouth alone. I found my husband
we have officially mastered the walk of shame
It's just like the Real World with babies
Everything about him screamed your future.
I love wearing low cut shirts cuz then when class gets boring, I can look down and admire my breasts.
Just saw the new iPhone. I would totally let Steve Jobs and Jon Ive eiffel tower me right now.
Actually considered writing down one of the numbers on the bathroom stall. That's how much I miss vagina.
Be prepared to possibly be invited to a fancy strip club breakfast on Friday and be prepared to say yes.
Everytime the frat boy touches his bro's ass after making a cup take a drink
You were fucked up like a footballbat trying to eat gum off your shoe. And that wasn't even the nights lowest point.
I'm a professor! I can't be caught chasing the liquor with you hooligans once the undergrads have seen my face
when I die covered in cocaine, hookers, and tequila at 73 years old just remember that I once had a tweet with that many retweets
You ghosted you're own booty call. Wow what a sad sad man.
the D I S R E S P E C T of sending someone nudes, them opening it, and not bothering to respond
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