why do married chicks ALWAYS cry after?
Do brothers usually kiss their sisters?
eating raw peppers to burn the taste of semen out of my mouth
As far as classy things to do in front of your ex go, throwing up on your own shirt is not one of them.
All I remember from my 21st is crying because the bouncer made him put his shirt back on
Just so you know, you're MY booty call. Feel degraded.
Your penis chewing exercise is not working
He tried to use a signal flare to light the bong
And?
He melted the stem
I have dibs on his crisis of faith.
The cop actually kicked the bitches out of the cab so we could get ours. I flipped them all off as the door was shutting. That drunk.
They invented a new game at work. Its called guess if I'm baked, hungover, drunk, or some combination of the three. Its surprisingly very difficult..
I guess that means I was blowing a nerd last week.
And loving it.
I just want somewhere where I can sit down, without changing my clothes, that will serve me breakfast food and booze. Is that too much to ask?
Just got back to the apartment. Why os there now 14 identical toothbrushes in the bathroom and only the two of us live here?
I think my roomie is silently judging me for spraining my foot by having sex in a bounce house
so the bounce house and tequila was good idea then?
Randomize
