i blew a .213 what kind of thug blows the compton area code exactly? this guy
sometimes I think that if I just met him. he would have a crazy realization and fall madly in love with me. what do you say? I'm not just another fan.
you were so high you were expressing yourself in action figures
Tell mom and/or dad that I am going to be home late. I am really blazed. Don't tell them that part, though.
Just don't lie down.. Throwing up upwards is NOT cute the second time.
She said my main job as maid of honor is to ensure the groom doesn't find out that each of his seven groomsmen has had his penis inside her.
I'm sick of being broke. I had vicodin and frosting for lunch.
If it's not soft enough to fuck on, then we're not getting the new rug.
I was high last night eating a fudge bar and making eggs with toast and corned beef hash for a 2 am snack and my dad asked what I was and the only reply I could think of was "I'm an adult."
Please ask me to tell you about the time I watched two of my friends chase my drunk roommate with a broken foot around downtown
How can other people our age be acting like adults when I'm still taking my birth control pill with left over gin and tonic from the night before?
That's the 3rd time in 6 months I woke up on the hallway floor using a towel as a blanket, no clue how I got there. At least back when I was still drinking I could blame something other than myself for that kind of shit.
You should go to AA meetings and warn people about the dangers of sobriety.
HOW MANY BOYS NOT ONLY APPROVE OF YOUR PLAN TO BECOME POCAHONTAS, BUT WANT TO MAKE SURE YOU DO IT RIGHT? One, the answer is one, and he is the best and if anyone ever tries to steal him I can assure you they will never be heard from again
HE FINALLY TEXT ME AND CALLED ME BY MY TWITTER NAME STAND BY FOR THE WEDDING INVITE, BRIDESMAID
I was desperate and wasn't about to let my cereal get soggy so I ate it on the toilet. Don't let me repeat last night.
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